the story of a lady and a young woman

a letter to my dear darling

Filed under: Emak, Emak-General | Tags: | January 25th, 2009

my dear nani,

how was the new place, nak ?

i heard you arrived nearly midnight.
and you were very good during the 8 hours car ride.
i was nervous to learn that you would be in the car that long.
since you don’t like a car ride at all.
i understand son la, your new place is far much colder than hanoi.

i can’t stop thinking about you.
even when i left you here in hanoi 2 months ago.

yesterday after you left, i can’t stop crying.
sitting cluelessly on the kitchen floor.
ended up giving myself swollen eyes.

i hate goodbye.
i hate it so much.
this is my second time with you.

i think i lived in a dream for 4 days.
had you around again.
hold you in my arms again.
played all those silly games with you.
had my arms and legs decorated with all your scratches again.

darling, be a good boy, ok ?
don’t be too naughty.
don’t act like a super cat, nak.
it’s totally a different world over there.
you used to have me around before, who protected you.
now, i am no longer around.
remember that.

just be a good boy, ok?
no need to climb nor jump here and there like you used to do.
don’t get hurt, ok ?

please limit yourself in damaging things in the house.
you may damage my things, i won’t mind.
but now, it is totally different, boy.

be strong, will ya ?
like you did for the last 2 months since i left.
even you lost a lot of weight and have a scar on your neck.
but you managed to hanging tough.
do it again, will ya ?

miracle do happen, dear.
with the fact, at the last minute martin and christine are willing to adopt you.
it’s a miracle, don’t you think so ?

i hope another miracle will come to us again pretty soon.
we will never know, life is full of surprises as i told you many times.
perhaps you would be in my arms again.
like before, like the old days.
showering each other again with our love.

i hope you like the new doll.
stay cool with your toys, ok ?
make them last long.

please eat a lot like before, nak.
gain your weight back.
get chubby again.

dear darling,
if only you could talk like in the movie of dr. dolittle…
i will call you from time to time.
once christine is back, i will see you from her webcam, ok?

i love you deeply.
no doubt about it.
and i know you know how much i love you, dear.

be a good boy.
let me do all the praying.
hoping God will give us a way.
so we could be together again.

dear darling nani,
i am not saying goodbye now.
let’s keep our fingers cross.
hoping always for the best.

do take care, dear boy

you would be always in my heart.


hanoi, 12 january 2009
on my recent trip to vietnam
the letter is written in tears

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